Some on the right dislike Kevin Smith and his movies because he made the supposed anti-Catholic movie Dogma, smokes a lot of weed, and says motherfucker a lot. Mostly my compatriots don’t like him because they’re paid not to like him – they write articles about his corrupting influence and get paid for them. They spout what they think the rest of the right wants to hear. Ergo, I don’t pay them much heed.

I am a child of the Clerks era, when a fat kid from New Jersey maxed out his credit cards to make a movie about kids hanging out in a convenience store – back when I was cashier at a convenience store. A depanneur, in the local lingo.

I laughed my balls off at Dogma, which calls into question many of the tenets of the faith I was born to. Unlike a Muslim, I have a pretty good sense of humor about my religion.

I am also a dedicated listener of many of the shows on the SModcast Podcast Network – Smith’s windmill tilting semi-retirement project. I have my ex-boyfriend to thank for getting me hooked – he was a fan long before I was.

In any case, Kevin Smith’s penultimate movie, Red State (a horror movie not-so-loosely-based on the Westboro Baptist Church) is coming to town on Monday for a premiere screening, with Smith in tow for a Q&A. Tickets sold out waaaay too fast for me get hold of them. Pity.

Then I had dinner with Andrew Lawton the other night.

Lawton, who runs Landmark Report, has a press pass to the screening, which he graciously handed over to me. This in turn caused me to pee my pants, but whatever. So Monday night I’ll attend, and Tuesday morning the review etc will appear at Landmark. Obviously I’m looking forward to it.

Most importantly, Lawton knows that I’m not going to make tsk-tsk noises for the far right because they expect me to. If the movie sucks, I’ll tell you it sucks. If it’s good, I’ll tell you it’s good. But I have no bought-and-paid-for bias going into it, because I’m owned by nobody.

Just like Kevin Smith.

Brass Balls Radio: 15 clean minutes edition